Post 99: Road Rage in the Bible

Just wanted to give you a heads up that the next post is going to be a milestone... #100. This one's just number 99, so you can skim it if you want. However, I thought that subtitle might pique your interest. So... road rage in the Bible? Really? Well, sort of. Check out chapter #22 of the book entitled Numbers. What do you see in verses 23, 25, and 27? Balaam is beating his ride ("Stupid donkey!" I interjected while reading the story to my family just a while ago; my wife said she didn't remember that quip being in the story). (Ok, I've done that... beat my ride... usually when things go wrong with it, like when the brakes go out, or it won't start, or something; but it's been a while since I really did any beating on a car.) Road rage, but not really irritation at someone else's behavior. Well, I guess it is, since he's mad at his donkey. Anyway, what happens next is just plain bizarre: Balaam talks to his donkey. Ok, maybe it's not that weird... I talk to my car at times, after all. But Balaam's talking in response to his donkey's talking. What? Yep, talking donkey, cool! Now, if my car were to pipe up and yell at me for beating it, I think I'd probably be a little freaked out, but Balaam just talks back to his donkey like it's no big thing. Weird, but there's a lesson here, beyond the talking donkey. (And, no, I'm not suggesting that road rage is a Biblically accepted or supported practice as a conclusion!)

Where is Balaam going? He's going (apparently) to curse the Israelites who have come towards Moab and Jericho, at Balak's request (Balak was the king of Moab). Now, I say "at Balak's request" - let's look at that. Balak sent for Balaam, who is on "good terms" with God, but Balak says, "Hang on, let me check with God and see whether he wants me to go with you." And the next day he tells 'em, "Sorry, God said no." So they (the messengers of Balak) go home, but he sends them back to fetch Balaam again. And Balaam again checks with God, who says, "Ok, go with them, but only do what I tell you to do!" The next day, Balaam saddles up and heads off, but God's mad at him for going. What?! Didn't God just tell him to go with them? Why in the world then is He mad at him? Here's where the "apparently" comes in - after we see Balaam's donkey save him from being bisected by the Lord's angel's sword, we hear the angel of the Lord remind Balaam to "say only what I tell you to say." Thus, I think Balaam figured, "God gave the OK, I'll go ahead with these guys, curse the Israelites, get a nice paycheck from it, and then get back to being on God's side." Rationalizing away his intended actions... his motives are what got him in trouble. That's what really gets us in trouble all the time... it's not so much what we do, but why we do it that gets us in trouble (even Jesus made this point in the latter half of Matthew 5). But the talking donkey part is kind of cool... I suggested that my eldest son try to computer animate this story, and he suggested using a voice similar to Donkey from Shrek. Unfortunately he hasn't done it yet... it would be kind of neat. (Note: the emphasis in the paraphrased scriptures above is purely my own.)

I recently came across this guy's blog... it's a pretty neat place to visit, with some cool perspectives on the Bible. For instance, check out his post, "Walk Like an Egyptian..." - it re-inspired my daily reading, reminding me that the Bible isn't just "something to read" - it's pretty cool. (That post is similarly titled to a post of a friend of mine: "Walk Like an Egyptian" - note the lack of the elipsis- the three little dots- in her post title; of course, hers takes a completely different perspective, and had some neat discussion in its own right.) Note: I don't necessarily endorse all the guy's viewpoints - I've not even read all the posts on his blog - but I enjoyed that one that I read first, so I thought I'd share it with you, too. I also came across a pretty neat verse this morning: Psalm 34:19 - "The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time." (NLT, courtesy BibleGateway) Pretty cool, eh?

Hey... here's something I consider pretty neat... the Word of God, perspective. When God created everything, how did He do it? He spoke. He spoke! God created everything around us, out of nothing, by simply speaking. When you read the word of God, the Bible, or better yet when you memorize and quote/speak the verses, you're speaking words that have the power to create everything out of nothing! You're speaking God's words... powerful words. Not just some religious phrases, but words that have the very power of God in them. How cool is that?

A little while ago my daughter was debating on whether to take a shower or do her homework first, and mentioned she was tired. I suggested she do both simultaneously in order to save some time. I suggested that she could set her book outside the shower and take a rubber glove with her, inserting her wet hand inside the glove and using that to turn the page of the book without getting it wet (a slightly different use of a rubber glove: to keep the water in instead of out!).

Ok, I guess that'll do it for post #99. I'll have to really think to come up with a whopper for #100... look for it in a month or so. Oh, and don't forget that I'm still happily accepting Sony Ericsson Xperia X1 phones when they become available... :) Hope you had a happy Valentine's Day!